Saturday, January 16, 2010


I had to put the pub crawl behind me. It was a mistake and we were just going to be friends. This was going to be a challenge. I was dealing with a serious case of the holiday blues. The past couple of months had kicked my ass. Professionally, work was kicking my ass, personally I couldn’t pick myself up. I looked to my friends for help and all I could see was their diamond engagement rings or their cherub cheeked babies. I RSVP’d to my own pity party.

On the eve of Christmas Eve I stopped by the bar. I just wanted to chat with my ‘friend.’ During our adorable repartee, my friend mentioned in passing the he had Christmas gift for me. It caught me by surprise, and I tried to ignore it. After the third time that it was brought up, I knew that he wanted me to take notice. Crap, now I had to get him a gift. Shoot. What the hell was I supposed to get for my friend who had put thought into a Christmas gift for me? It was Christmas eve…. What the hell was I going to get. I was pissed, why did he have to buy me something?

Christmas Eve arrived and I was supposed to be at my parent’s house preparing for the holiday. I couldn’t spend time worried about what to buy this guy. I stopped at Walgreens to purchase tights, because that’s where I shop, and I thought, why not shop here for a gift? I took less than a minute to decide. On Thanksgiving, when my friend and I were seeing each other, he mentioned how little he liked Christmas. He said that he often felt that he put a great deal of thought into gifts for the people he cared about and in return he received stupid stuff that he didn’t need like socks and gift cards. How perfect, I purchased socks and a gift card! Christmas came and went, and I had wrapped my gift, not wanting to make the first move. This was his game, he had purchased me a gift first. He could text me to give me his present, I wasn’t going to call him. I didn’t have to wait long, his text came a couple of days after Christmas.

I met him at his bar, and he gave me his gift. Now, I’ll admit that I have never been a very good recipient of gifts. I unfortunately I've never had a poker face, I tend to show every thought or feeling that I have on my face, and often afterward those thoughts come out in words. Crap… now I was in the middle of a complicated situation and I had to open/give a gift.

I tore into the wrapping paper and opened up a lovely purple clutch. Oh my goodness, it was adorable. I was uncomfortable, how do I thank him appropriately, this was so weird. I awkwardly shoved my gift at him. He didn’t seem to be expecting a gift judging by his expression of surprise. I started to feel badly, I had bought him a snarky gift. I tried to explain my gift to him as he opened it, and he started laughing. He remembered that conversation and thought I was adorable, which was undeniable. He got it, he gave me a huge hug and definitely appreciated my snarkiness.

I sat and thought to myself, why had I ended things with him again? He understood me, he thought I was funny, and he knew things that I liked. Gosh, deep down inside, I knew that he was bad for me. The holiday blues were so thick that it was getting hard to remember why he was bad for me.

No comments: